Real Life

Starlight Moonlight

January 28, 2008

There is something ethereal about a winter night. I was driving out of town after work this week and it was as if the world was a snowglobe, shaken softly by God’s love, the road glazed like a butterscotch donut, and the night train passing opposite as I drove home.

A tear, or rather a gulp of a cry, caught in my throat and no sound came out, but the gasp caught, I squirmed, and just asked God in my heart, “what am I doing?!”. Overwhelmed by the dream and task ahead…
I’ve stepped out and will be leaving for England in five weeks. Much like Peter walking on water, I find myself following what I believe is Christ’s call for this next season, though instead of sinking, I’m finding God walking with me. I sold my car this weekend, people are excited and rallying behind my dream, and though there are many details yet to be dealt, I know God is in it.
I’ve discovered that there is a great burden in carrying a promise or a dream, and only until you try do you realize the importance of what you carry. Its not an “I want to”, it’s an “I must”.
So I continue. To trust. To stand. To do the work. For only when I step out on the limb do I find the fruit God is so eager to meet me with.

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  • Shandelle January 31, 2008 at 10:04 PM

    Your writing paints the world in beautiful colours & inspires me! I love the woman you are and am so grateful for the years in which together we learned to navigate adulthood!

  • kenton February 1, 2008 at 6:34 PM

    Great writing Lani. I love the fact that you are taking a risk. It is hard to grow unless you do. Embrace every moment whether joy or sorrow, acceptance or lonliness, laughter or pain. Embrace it all. Journal it all.
    A cool quote that I recently ran across:
    “A ship in a harbour is safe, but that is not what ships are made for.”
    > – John Shed –

    We’ll miss you.


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